Taking Care of Yourself While You Are a Caregiver
When you are helping someone through a bone marrow or cord blood transplant (also called a BMT), a great deal of your energy is focused on that person. Caring for someone going through a transplant can be stressful. You may be juggling the needs of the patient, yourself and other family members. If the patient is your spouse or partner, you may be taking on many tasks he or she once did in addition to your own tasks and the new ones that come with the transplant.
To do your job well, you also need to take care of yourself. Here are some ways to take care of yourself:
- Take some time out for yourself every day, even if it is only fifteen minutes. Talk to friends or spend a quiet moment away from the patient to do something that helps you feel rested.
- Find someone to talk to who can give you emotional support. If the person you usually count on is the transplant patient, he or she probably can't fill that role right now. You may be able to find support from friends or family members, other transplant patients' families or support groups.
- Your loved one's transplant center may be able to put you in touch with a local support group and/or with other transplant caregivers.
- Join a support group online. One possibility is BMT-Talk, a large support group of transplant patients and caregivers at all stages of the transplant process. Join at http://www.acor.org/index.html. (Look for BMT-Talk in the Mailing Lists section of the site.)
- Get connected with another caregiver through the Blood & Marrow Transplant Information Network (BMT InfoNet) — http://www.bmtinfonet.org (see the Helpful Services section).
- Focus on what's important. You can't do everything. Reserve your energy for what really matters to you and the patient.
- Ask for help. Be willing to delegate some of your daily and weekly tasks to friends and family members who want to help.
- Try to eat well-balanced meals, exercise and get enough sleep.
- Ask a friend or family member to be your advocate, just as you are being the patient's advocate. Your advocate can keep an eye on you and help you get the support and time you need to take care of yourself.
- Give yourself a break. A few hours or even days away from the patient can renew your energy. A friend or family member may be able to stay with the patient. Your county or other public agencies may also have a respite caregiver program of trained volunteers who could stay with the patient.
- Do something you love. Pick something that reminds you of the parts of your life that may be put on hold while you are focused on caregiving.
- Give yourself credit for the work you are doing. Sometimes people focus on the patient and forget about the effort of the caregiver. Sometimes even the patient is too sick or tired to appreciate all you are doing.
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